Crafting a Life that Sparks Joy: Your Guide to Authentic Living
Read time: 4 MinutesHey There Sunshine,
Picture this: you wake up excited about the day ahead and go to bed that night, satisfied with what you accomplished. No late-night ruminating on your failures. No morning dread about going to work or other responsibilities. Instead, those holes are filled with gratitude and joy. A life worth living.
Embarking on building your ideal life takes a deep understanding of your capabilities, boundaries, and aspirations. It requires letting go of the "shoulds" and embracing the authentic. It's about recognizing the importance of self-care, self-discovery, and aligning with your core values. By integrating practical steps and reflective exercises, you can pave the way for a life that shines with purpose and fulfillment.
In this article, I hope to load up your tool belt with some tricks of the trade so you can start your build from the foundation.
Key Takeaways:
Setting realistic work boundaries is crucial to prevent burnout and sustain long-term productivity.
Taking personality quizzes can aid in self-discovery and understanding personal values.
Adapting daily routines and activities according to feminine cycles can lead to improved mood and energy levels.
Finding a supportive online community can provide valuable connections and a sense of belonging.
Crafting your ideal life is an ongoing journey that involves self-awareness, passion nurturing, and staying true to your values.
“Be brave enough to live the life of your dreams according to your vision and purpose instead of the expectations and opinions of others.”
CAREER
When you are driven by passion and novelty, the structure and monotony of corporate life are suffocating.
Setting Realistic Boundaries at Work
It's impossible to love your life while suffering from burnout. Especially for neurodivergents, a schedule that accommodates your energy levels and allows for rest is imperative. For most of us, work is necessary to keep the lights on, but using healthy work-life balance strategies helps sustain productivity long-term. Avoiding burnout at work is the cherry on top!
I recommend tracking your time for a couple of weeks and figuring out how many hours per day you work now. Not just "on the clock" but active, focused work. Look for trends; do you have a significant drop off in productivity after a long day? Do you get way more done on Tuesdays than any other day of the week?
Set the Stage for Financial Independence
Read all about how to diversify your income here.
Do you want my opinion? If you value freedom and creativity, you will struggle with full-time traditional employment. When you are driven by passion and novelty, the structure and monotony of corporate life are suffocating.
Let this be your sign to explore entrepreneurship. Look for freelance opportunities. Consider occasional gig work like childcare or events. Explore passive income streams that align with your interests and goals. Embrace the possibility that diversifying income sources has been the answer all along.
CLARITY
By understanding personal traits, we can forgo conventional wisdom for a unique approach to life
Using Tools and Assessments to Uncover Your True Self
Since my ADHD went undiagnosed until I was 28, I had spent many years playing the chameleon role, mirroring back whatever my surroundings showed. One of the biggest challenges that came from unmasking was the realization that I had no idea who I really was. As a result, I found myself unsure what voices I could trust and what intuitions were just habits.
Luckily, more brilliant people than myself have carefully curated countless self-discovery quizzes and personality assessment tools to learn what makes us tick. I recommend starting here for more info on what quizzes give you what. By understanding personal traits, we can forgo conventional wisdom for a unique approach to life.
As an Enneagram 4, I discovered that showing up for myself with consistent self-care will build up my confidence. I learned not to spend too much time imagining a new project and romanticizing it. Instead, I now try to conceive what my life and relationships will look like when I accomplish a goal. A core values quiz taught me that I should always be learning and pouring into my community because it lights me up.
The Power of Showing Up for Yourself
About a year ago, I bought a clearance whiteboard chore chart. Shortly after, I crossed out the word chore, replacing it with "Self-Care." Since then, hanging proudly in my kitchen is a list of 10 things I aim to do daily that make me feel better.
Many things have made that list over the months:
Read 10 pages (it took a long time, but I read BOOKS now, y'all. Great daily habit)
Get Dressed
Shower Daily
Move my Body
Leave the House
15-Minute Tidy (I'm highly affected by visual clutter… and gamifying tasks)
Mediate
Use Sunsama (my preferred daily planner)
Seasonal depression has crept in and brought with it a dip in hygiene and cleaning practices around my home. As a result, my self-care chart is chock full of basic care tasks, and I've pulled the breaks back a bit on self/business development to set more realistic goals.
I track my moods alongside these daily practices, and you better believe my mood improves with daily self-care practices. With that comes a refreshed energy to work towards my goals with focus.
What 10 things would you put on your chart?
Daily Planning Based on Feminine Cycles
If you haven't learned anything about the different phases of menstrual cycles, try starting here.
In a nutshell, people who menstruate experience natural fluctuations in energy, hormones, and more during their cycles. By anticipating those changes and harmonizing work with hormonal shifts, we can live more joyful lives.
Below is a simple list of lifestyle adjustments with menstrual phases I’ve integrated. I have PCOS, which causes irregular cycles. Still, for most of 2023, I've attempted these things, and I notice a HUGE difference in my mood swings and negative self-talk habits.
Menstrual Phase
No advance social or event plans
Planned Low Spoon Days (use more prepared foods, ask for help cleaning, maintenance work tasks only)
Get to Bed Early
Follicular Phase:
Exercise Daily
Socialize Daily (visit friends, facetime, talk to strangers at the store!)
Planned High Spoon Days (I'll plan home & work projects for these days and put in extra hours)
Ovulatory Phase:
Self-Development (somatic dance, journaling, art practice)
Socialize Regularly
Nesting Habits (deep clean, meal prep, home admin)
Luteal Phase:
Daily (additional) self-care practice (do a craft, take a long bath, dance & sing in the mirror)
Early Bedtime
Low Spoon Day
RELATIONSHIPS
One positive thing we got from the internet age is nurturing online communities.
Find your Corner of the Internet
The phrase "Find your Tribe" can ring hollow when you have nothing in common with the people around you. I've been there before. Where it seems like no one in your life gets you. Despite its negatives, a positive thing we got from the internet age is nurturing online communities.
Trust me, your dream life includes building supporting networks, even for the niche little pieces of you. There is joy in engaging with like-minded individuals who’ve endured what you have. Even reading their stories can bring comfort.
There are a million Facebook Groups and Subreddits for every possible topic. Full of people asking questions, showing up, and providing encouragement. Consider the possibility of strangers having what you need.
Conclusion
Crafting your ideal life is a journey, not a destination. Remember, it's all about embracing who you are, nurturing your passions, and staying true to your values. Stay committed to the process and connect deeply with your inner self. Remember to live life on your own terms.
